crackle pop

Jeff Crouch

There's a vat in a brain cooking up dreams, there's a brain in a vat, wondering. There's a shadow on everything. Special oils and fresh salt in an old wound. Willie Wonka. The sugar stars H.L. Mencken. Dropping candy like a di a heretical el eph ant, Sir Cus Sing. Stay connected, ding dong while disconnected drop off the phon eme. Stainless steel. Being eaten. Savor, savored, unsavory. Chophouse Loman and his Dim Sons Blue.

X Marx Brothers See Spots Run. P on go. CDV. 101.

While. The tool of the tool of the tool und so weiter. Counting comes before language. Finger it. LOL 8 U. Knowing was always number. Numb-er lumber ing home. Ho ho ho. Tax re-cords. White dwarf. What counts. Tin commandments ear co. Ouch. This otherness as one, two, three, and naming, and counting, and naming. And counting, and breathing, and one, and ... . Beethoven.

Ta-da, deaf.

Pay up, pay ola. Birth le mazarati. Red giant record contract and expand by Glut by Golly, a barf bag is needed. Stay connected to the body in the world of out of. Dimin is h___. Birth mother. body works world. Scattergraph of ___________________. This morning. Mother, the corpses, sinews, blood vessels, garlic salt, beef jerky, mince meat, raisins, plum pudding, organs, other stuff, a stiff drink, a derogatory remark. Horrorshow somehow ghost horses. Three, for, sound off.

Not the other world. Heat seeker thundercloud. Chariot and cheerio. Put a finger on it. In it. Initialize. Go. Even with a bad hairdo. Pickle plucked. The name of the game. Other worldly. Infinite. Uncle. I give up. I confess. I. Well enough. Cantor set. Let's find him. TOMMY. Phil, O mel, me. His wives.

Looking left and right and up and down. Everywhere is a shadow. Heat map. Od Law Sherew. He's in there, among them. But where is she? Oven. Seven among fifteen. Estrogen, again, estrogen. Chess pieces made of cheese. Das tut mir leid. Tongue out, tongue. Open.

Mint 2 B 8 10. Mayonnaise or tartar sauce, __________________(or __________________ as they are known) are the hottest new __________________ and have had a documentary commissioned on their violent past. All performance. However the camera crew are with __________________ (aka __________________ __________________) when he is shot at by someone whom __________________ confesses is the real __________________. Sauerkraut, the Cat, the Jester. Destroyer.

Feeling punchy, dressed like a mime. Punch sack Odysseus. In a mask of desire. The Limp Bizkit version of The Who's "Behind Blue Eyes." Internal organs. Discover l.i.m.p. say it [x4]. The need for this to be about something—is almost overwhelming. is, almost. over overwhelming. ing. ing. The alpha and the omega, a measure in the unmeasured mire. Trophy Club. Nailed. Is that your name on the guest list? Welcome to the most famous topless bar in the world with our plastic vinyl air. Cigar? Utter Lee Ant Honey B U R die SS. Yes, this girl is gorgeous. Moo milch bar. Milky, milky way, milk me. Jessie, how about a kiss?

Sir, you look like a clown. Would you like to sing us a song? Treat us to the music of teaspoons. Chime on. Let your stilts tilt a whirl. A champagne for you my good man. Now dance before I put a bullet in up. Allen Jones. Human chair. Moloko. Decanted. CSI vivi section 10 D N/A memory imperfect clue.

Bleached blind cleansing flu.

Firetruck. What makes a difference, whose engine chugs out the symptom. Put out the fire. Death burned down. And there's desire. How far will it go? Toot, toot, peanut butter! Inflation, not the same as inflatable. Expanding, contracted. Ninety-nine cents plus tax. Healing suave hole. My house is on fire!

My blow-up doll. A need to be strong. Allen Jones. Everyone is dead. Alone. Hal. Long ago. The sunset. The sunrise. A pocket full of change. The rattle of cans. Oyster pearl swine. Rooster the practical yard barn math. Cube Rich Stan Lee. Smith and Smith.

Once, I had a lot of thoughts. Shotgun Brautigan.

With additional fruit toppings and Richard Nixon Quaker oats. A singer in the chorus. While marijuana and cocaine are on the list, and also, submarine sandwiches, and love is a fresh carpet with deodorizer thrown into the ambush. The toy soldiers have made a latrine of lemon drops.

We wasted a lot of money.

Anchovies. Nervous.

Don't question the way these extra toppings are spread out. Sprinkles, sprinkles for the May Queen. Arms open wide. Thanks Entropy. Cancelled prom creed dirty sons and dirty daughters.

Places to go. Her thigh high miracle.

Whoop out that map.

Bloody Mary Sunshine.

The poor panhandler has a wet pack of cigarettes. Tigris and Euphrates are both beautiful girls sleeping beneath the sheets. Cleopatra, you couldn't handle her Nile, had a fistful of daughters, the croc of the clock, wide as a flood plain to see it's not she him dial the Nile. Flapjacks. Father O'Malley, the home for boys. Gawking. Girls, girls, girls, my motley. Gaping.

Erase the letters and tomato dressing all mollusk.

A can of soup called consciousness, the clam. Heat it up in the microwave. Brain waves, not really a language, not an echo of King Saul, yet with the echo of voices, not an alphabet. Cold color keeping. Vocal. Raw or cooked or canned or frozen. The words float by like so much sewage. ________ without the stink. Windex, hand wipes. John the Baptist, headless.

Harpsichordist. What the psalmist had in mind, the ends of his fingers on the strings. Strum, softly, my guitar gently weeps. But don't assume meaning for me and I n.g.. What does it profit a man? If no good should come of this, but birth and murder, birth. Mind, flotsam. Wince at the stench. Narrative. Profane Pasolini, who understood. Torture, and then goes home to the wife and kids. Words bear meaning no better than a picture bears meaning. Word a picture paint with, pointing back to. A prisoner to his sentence. Macbeth.

Duff Beer, David.

It won't be meaningful for long. So long to all that. Kubrick.

The bears find freedom. Ho Nyugen.

Just the words Bird. Use your words. It's not meaningful, whatever your claims to the contrary. Is it worth twenty bucks? We are all going to die, and even if we didn't. The good wine, the good cheese, the good music. A teenager ups and vomits. Sack cloth. And the things gone bad. Sports Hall of Fame. We'll get by, but not with closure. I said, "Not with closure." No Zeno to be had here. What are you folks looking at?

Lighter than eternal darkness? Percentage truth.

You can short circuit the doldrums, but the beat goes on. Star Trek Convention. The Mousetrap on Hamlet, the Rube Goldberg. Organ grinder. Fisticuffs. Free pizza. Looks like someone wants to win.

Oars loose. Horses in full gallop poll and steeple chaise longue.

Speaking Greek. Stand there blinking. The bling king, concubines. Combines, corn. French kiss horn. Agamemnon.

Time to work on a leaky faucet. Swordfish, a fudged up piece of hope Arkansas drive-by pinewoods, Buck Mulligan, the Ozarks.

The good word is ___________________________.

You were going to ask, _________________? Password please protected putter sputter.


In the Hole.

I got my headlights turned off. I'm 'bout to bust some _______________ off.


Take it SpongeBob.

I'm 'bout to spread some tartar sauce. I'm an Employee of the _______________.

Some fish lie and some fish cry about the wicked ways of love.

Everybody now. Fish brutality! I know your fellow fish is grieving, (_______________ 'EM!)

Tonight we get even. A big bass stopped me for nuthin'!

Mint 2, Bee Eton.

Hairy hole whole butter biscuit wit thin thinker Texas with Dallas all over her big ass baked Alaska strawberry juice running down thighs like tenderloin and sponge cake, soft, moist, underarm. Icing. Edge. That's the inorganic pre-slaughter of the senses, and isn't it chemical? Fair moan. Smell her tenderly, girl. Gland, Hawaii. Pine apple. Why Kiki? Kinky, and who's running with the _____________?

How butter waffle flat is a newspaper hotel room chessboard funnel cake Coors Light lit cigarettes John Wayne, John Wayne Gacy, the Pyramids prison art Dermic! Wayward children. Leaving Egypt on a tricycle. __________cter.

Everything conspires to __________________.

Completely pickled senseless pimento and she is, and she's completely _______________. Completely. The cheese is good. And so the bun warmer.

Toasted, the Daughters of the Revolution smile, and meanwhile, load the canon, fodder, father, dear Lord. Now there's the vaccine that eradicates the human. Shot after shot. A three layer cake. A dirty cactus, prick. Desert justly. Exercise bike.

Inch by inch.

Flies the ancient kite, key keeper.

Take it Fish Daddy.

I know your momma's grieving, (_______________ HER!) ________ ____________, but tonight we get even, yeah!

Everybody now. Hush puppies.

Luscious peels open her vinyl skein to reveal her bulging swamp fossil. Turns another page of Cartoon Vixen. Ride off into the sunset. With a huge hush. Hush. Tightly. Sewn shut.

Sticky stuff.

But rolling _______________? And larger than life high as a tree in the dark forest, a complete smash, a pile up, or pile on. Slightly different than beating them up because they were _______________? Not a bottle left empty. Sucker, sucking, saugling.

Car wreck in a forest.

Easy dough, easy doughs it. It rises fast enough. Refrigerator empty. Yeast when you know it. At least the ketchup comes honestly, mayonnaise, if slow good. Your friend Jerry held them accountable. Sculpted earrings for $9.95. Melts in your mouth. All beauty and youth, the fresh taste. Filet. A man dies crossing the street. Abbey Road.

Co Co N U Tease.

Enjoy the ________ ________ ______ with the luscious traffic stopping double bright yellow vinyl pants tight as spandex but a thick as thin fluoresce like a highlighter for a textbook turned high gloss cartoon carbon black jet fighter but with a glossy sheen. Sit next to me in church understatement. Overexcited.

Fighter jet.

Baby, are those roadstripe pants painted on in your neighborhood? How do we get this package opened? I want to prize my prize. Day-glo, acrylic, lycra, split the obscene, backseat seat cushion, tender vinyl.

Jessica Rabbit.

Cushion latex balloon. Sex drugs rock and roll the same as everybody else I don't know. I am a leather motorcycle glazed donut honey bun banana pie cherry bomb. Your initials seam. Rub tightly. Rip your skein braless cotton. Fish boobs lemon. The universe drips, the bat cave. Lady of the Lake, Jenny O, ham it up. Delicious.

Kind of pasty without make-up, rather pale. Incredibly fun blowing money out my _______________. It's hard to look at my corpse. The mirror, but I'm losing focus. Drunk driver afterbirth. Praised for your courage, you die anyway. Reaching out for love, another shrimp. Adjust the font size. Her flesh eating pimp. Kill the pimps! Hawaiian shirt.


The gorge that she hips leg oars rowing. Shipwrecked on the seas of slaughter. Lycidas. Floating road constructions that re-assemble me. Plastic part. Beauty queen. Find this. Arms and legs. There is no intelligence, only behavior. And counting. Restitched a severed finger.

Mrs. Claus, you look delicious, can I eat you and all your extra sugar. Melt in my mouth.

Neither entelechy nor entelechy saves you. Thread. Dead. Thread. One day with all your money. Wears a wet cherry apple tart lipgloss smear hotly my forever. A stop sign in the daydream. Perfume. And holding.

Melancholy and Melancholy, Attorneys at Law. Overjoyed, the Lotto. Magna cum loudly. Sheer as sheer can get. Freaking _____________________. Nor M us.

You were never here, my dear Plato, the wall of the cave is made for fringe writing, imperfect angle. Lic or ice. Pluto, free Persephone, po me gran I te seed wife. Closing Inn. Fingers working a bare three ads. There's fat ring ning. There's a marble column pillar of SALT II. There's a museum with windows only arch sex with her. Stirring, not a creature, loves trouble. Jiggle, jiggle. Nuclear pension plan. Cabaret. Marble floor column. Mopping. Enters the petting zoo with his children in tow. Sty in the eye, pigsty. The bartender's name is Mo.

Mo and Mo. Defense Department.

Can I leave them here? Do really believe work is bad for people? Finger puppets. Split seam puckered up.

Suffer the children. Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin. Rumpelstiltskin.

Red fingernail polish. Sparkle, the sperm bank. Closed for donations. Pay the Piper no less than more or less than no go.

No one can shake him. Ivy. Vampire. Infertile myrtle. Leftover mystic.

Krispy Kreme takes her go-go boots off. A rabbit hole, sheer blue skirt. An icon from Japan, twirling a baton. Minister the Robot. Kisses deeply. Our stocks stake a plunge. Stocking stuffer. Hose job. Zip up the corset puller free of the wreckage string. Buxom.

Stoked, but then. Super delicious and decadent. Barbecue beef buttered brisquet. Raspberry Swiss cheese and chocolate whipped cream. Buck naked confection.

Yes, her father, Mr. Pink, the __________________, is coming to punish us—either for being too permissive or for sticking our noses in somebody else's doughnuts. His daughter's dough, sure enough. Where's my crème de la crème? Glazed, dazed. Do not, I said, do not, tell.

In the phonebook, Erection Wreckers Demo. Pound cake, pocket mouse, ginger.

Sugar is its own idea. Take a bite out of Crime and her mother, the one and only Baby Doll.

The husband has arrived, D.F. Tractor. The original crime, though pensive. Sure is my uncle, monkey.

Twirls her bra. Singer of songs. There are laws to be broken, girl. Watermelon wine. Cors et.

What's the three-digit code? The garage door won't open. My Mazarati does one eighty-five. I lost my license, now I don't drive.

Run my finger through the cake icing. Stealing a stereo. Famous science. Pinto.

Run my fingers through your hair. Gumby. A crime you can't pay for, an error unmended.

The beer is cold, but your breath is bad. The fish aren't biting. Harley Hardly. Time to cleanse.

Breakfast cereal, blind drunk. Ten years soaking up vodka and doing nothing particularly important, making his daughters his ______ __________. Reality TV. California divorce court. I forgot to pay you.

In the front yard, tossing the football. Who wants to be a captain of industry? Hide under your desk. Dos Passos the football.

Hanging out in the bedroom, or a public bathroom. Gross! Underwear drawer. Your perfume delicious scent. Since sense, make no gods, odor me.

Make it pretty, make it sing, sweet nothing.

Racing cars up and down the road. Blaring blare, the blarney stone. Nice tires, her wet suit. Liquid paper and Post-It notes, Macbeth, Macbeth, the unspun. Foam balls in the fish tank, spinning around. The foam fish are putting on lipstick, kissing clowns. Lava lamp. Silly putty, a pretty mauler. We create the ancient roles, talk about progress, run out of gas. Turn the radio off to the races. The squeak of tennis shoes. The whole house is painted beige. Bright colors sparkle in the candy crevice.

Snot mixes in with the icing. The bars on TV seem quite fun. Friends, libation.

Boredom is a land of opportunity. Wait on the traffic.

Everyone, and I mean everyone, at her office wears thigh high boots and miniskirts. Engorged on ponderous philosophy, the laxative made him vomit. Tupperware and grocery store giveaways. She was a hand model holding up a fruit salad, banana in hand.

Grocery shopping in her PJs, early morning sausage and scrambled legs. All fluorescent on the linoleum, too skinny, too fat, but skin as delicious as that of a glazed donut, in her twenties, in her underwear, but absinthe and pleasure, not here, take her, take her to the Bohemian end of a few centuries back, a bee-bopping tune, a honey hive. The sticky honey sock. Undercooked eggs chicken ass cheeks, sweet alive, waiting on the music. Pan flute, fluted glass. Toast. Midnight, 3 AM. The weave of her burst nest in the floorshine, by the cold cuts and cheese, cold milk. Earl Campbell hot links, New Orleans. Cantaloupe, taste of berries for breakfast. English muffin. Past imperfect tense. Cigar sugar biscuit. Smoke, benedictum. I breathe again.

The pace of the drinking has to slow down or you are going to be sick. Crescendo.

There were children involved for heaven's sake. Act like an adult, a responsible one.

Sorry about Lucy. The decomposition truck garden, vegetable salad fingers, fertility clinic. The rooster snail. The rabble rabbles on. A different kind of Donkey Kong, King Richard. Ding dong the witch is dead. Donkey Kong head on or off, Alice in Chains. Head games. Foreign or somebody at the front door, the Mad Hatter. Here's a knocking indeed. Out of money. Dunkin Donuts. You've coffee, friend, and a bible lesson. Co Co Puffs the Magic Dragon, murmurs. Minimarshmallows made of a still beating heart. Champagne, Wagner, Caviar. Kung-fu cummerbund. Desire is an extra stick-on. Hochzeit. Shimmer. Shish kabob, the Peelers.

Welcome to the Gingerbread Temple. The Forest of No Return. Red rum some, mansion Charles. While. At the National Convention, Santa Claus had his enormous gift deep inside his toy sack, and Jitterbug, who decided to distance himself from the _______________ , yelled "When in doubt, whoop it out!" The Pig of All Pigs. Rabelais. Smart boys.

A poster child of what does it profit. Potatoes. Panurge. War vets. Until it goes to pork chop, no less one of the greater American minds. Toasted cheese. Lunch on a gag order. Spreading her legs wide. The tollbooth is open. Surcharge, slip a dollar inside. The tollway, the troll.

Neither a treatise on _____________, nor a guide to political ______________, nor yet a sociological______________, the symposium was an image of what the _______________ life could be. She called it "Grandma's Remedy." A hot toddy. Statistics offers a scattergraph. Here's the map of unknown intentions. Titties.

Cartoon figures inflated, then deflated. Silver, chrome, clean as chrome. Chrome like chemical action, cleaner. Jeff Koons. Namedropping as usual. Teddy bears. The man has already been mentioned and shows no interest in talking to you.

A sushi of social thought and ___________ categorical criticism, the lecture was tedious and boring, with fatuous professors expounding on none too relevant social theory. A few raw _______________, followed by tag team talks.

Raw as her unbridled farts. Too many eggs in a broken ass kick. An entourage of lawsuits. All the discontent. Horse radish radically yours newly wed. There is no information here. The data is all flawed. Numbers unnumbered. Tedious. Spilled beer, sloppy beauty. Unwashed dinge.

Super Joe, make it so.

Its transmutation and splintering in the years after ____ in order to illuminate often overlooked trends in _______________ intellectual life as well as the development of rented tuxedoes posing as high-class wives of state officials. Better hair, and state-sponsored wigs for hookers! Ker-shaw. Bernard. Show me that! Deep off the coast, the jellyfish. The final group to preserve that memory. Peach. A chorus line of cranberry juice, oranges, and coffee; sushi and Southern Comfort. Famous football player. Run long for a pass. Now catch!

Santa Claus has a long talk with Hugh Hefner. The grotto. Mouth full of hair. Sperm-killing chlorine, but does it work? My dear Mr. Dinge.

The whipped cream revolution, nearing the Artic Circle, the North Pole, and the baked coconut topping, and in submission to the past and to _____________ ____________ found, pugnacious Vegetable Party, the term became popular among social psychologists and sociologists because it fit the concerns of post delight, the Buddha named Larry on national TV. The undercooked clams.

The impetus for Smorgasbord had been two sets of concerns—one raised by Beer Drinking's challenge to Vodka values and the other one by the relentless blah-blah. Blah blah blah. Bleating lambs. The most shaped and many, the hot sauces, the mint sauce, while his ideas and instincts proved predictive of trends in the fifth dementia. Corner folded back. The coroner around the corner. The pick-up. She telephones ahead. David Lynch Mob. The coroner in her scuba suit set for a deep dive.

Abandoned the children to ten hours of TV, the drone of nothing in particular, followed by machine gun fire or a bombing. We have a cause—you're enjoined, enjambed. Swollen lips, a cotton swab. Dirty scab. Fresh feet, dithyramb.

In this case, Heineken, who was her date for the evening, was out front, sitting in his car. He, Heineken, was married to a holograph machine, a spy camera, a puff of smoke, a cooler full of beer, a card carrying liberal with the drink. Bonnie and Clyde, our famous breakers, some chewing gum, and the secret people on the secret people list. Little black dress, wonderful high heels. Iambic, pent up, not having her.

Bullet hole.

Wake up in the middle of the night, naked.

While crazy, once Crazy Redtongue, _______________ at work, always telling me idiotic jokes. Apricot May in June, squirting music. What's your average? Smoking for the halibut.

His argument for profiling, the statistics don't lie: When _______________ of the people who get arrested are _______________ , in cities where _______________ of the population is _______________ , that is not _______________ profiling, that is the Desert of Probability. Sticks to density, density sticks. Just in time desserts with whipped cream and a clock. See you in Austria. Schlagsahne.


Idaho as often. My cousin, skin. Ben Martin. Cleaning fluid. The cleaning lady saved her children from a burning building. You dirty turd!

Flint, but no ethnic fruit allowed. Toodles, the yogurt butcher shop? All sloppy of a sudden panic, the Spanish-language documents for cabbage, boiled, and one __________________. Today, and _________ ____________, if tribute is paid—but no one to mourn an ice cream, dipped, but never revived, and he wanted to revive his Hawthorne, the "Maypole of Merry Mount." A rose bush, sugar cane. Confection, blowing powdered sugar.

Nose me at the bakery, two fingers in. Rumpelstiltskin.

Cherries on top of you, Black Forest Torte. The frontier justice, not quite molasses, a sweet and sour juice, running down her thighs, his thighs, whiskey, guns, kidnapping, and clean stories of kidneys and livers and bus rides off the deep end. There were amazing chocolate chip cookies, who became the Chocolate Chip Cookies.

My father and grandfather didn't shrimp in vain. Nitrogen. What's on your agenda?

Pull up your fish nets. Fish your ears out of the basket. Fisheye alive. Look, a glazed donut. Mouth full of flies. Lord of, thoughts of the starving. People die.

Her wonderful legs lead to heaven.

Underground tunnel. What does it prophet a man without profit a man without and within? This guy will chicken us about his ancestors, but we won't hear a word from him about _______________ folks whose ancestors were on the wrong end of the lunch line. The fish and the fish food all in the same salad. You are what you eat, __________________!

Who is waiting to be born?

Imagine getting stuck in traffic. Faking it for real. Not vampire blood. Oozing. Human tongues cut free of corpses, used as bandages. I am a body of tongues. The wounds, the old wounds. She works in Accounting.

The flies abuzz with menses, the menstrual blood, the spent tampon. The itchy odorizer. Sewage is a parking lot.

You are roofless.

A hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other biscuit. Slathered in honey, slathered in gravy. What this statement really supports is the end of small biscuit, the small of her back, back home, and the rise of the frog legs company whose corporate hydra are all named John Doe. Lean on me. Ambergris and the spawn. Underneath the refrigerator. Big NO. Miss America.

Too, the frog legs company has already secured cheese breaks and all kinds of other cabbage perks. Alligator, ripped apart. In passing, they were all blanks. Cow head. Horse head agenda. Passing gas. Hidden treasure, sunken boat. Uninspired blandishments. About the flipside of the Witch's Kitchen. Rumpelstilzchen.

Jeff Crouch is a wirter in Texas. His blog is Famous Album Covers